"My name is Leah Schare and I’m here to say/ that I rap my rhymes for breakfast every day/ then I eat rap for lunch, save a little for dinner/ yeah, I rock the mic like I’m Ghost Face Killah./ You probably didn’t know that I’m a rap god queen/ my words hittin your innards all the way down to your spleen/ so let me educate you, tell you how it is/ so you can run and tell all your grandkids./ I was born on LI, baby, you know that/ my pops man’s a doctor, but he don’t yell ‘stat!’/ he makes people’s brains feel good like cherry pie/ and when he through don’t no one want to cry./ My brother’s a barista and that’s kinda cool/ wears glasses too, but takes ‘em off for the swimming pool./ Me, I keep it up on the down beat/ my flow so fine it can blow your mind/ I like halloween and Ryan Gosling/ I leave my facebook logged in and I like drag queens./ So now you know how I flow, got you caught in my undertow, so/ that’s all I got, that’s all my words to say/ so I’m gonna log into neopets and play. IT’S 2011, PEACE TO YOUR MOTHERS."

matt grote’s birthday is happening so we made him a dick cake